by Pastor Afolabi Oladele

As we celebrate Fathers’ Day, I think we should use this opportunity to take stock of what fatherhood entails, and what it was destined to be, because fathers are begetters of offspring. So I pose this question to you fathers: “who are you populating the world with?” This message is to help us as fathers estimate how far we have gone in this responsibility and role that God has given us. Whether you are already a father, a father-to-be or a child, this would be good for you.

 “There is a conspiracy of her prophets in the midst thereof, like a roaring lion ravening the prey; they have devoured souls; they have taken the treasure and precious things; they have made her many widows in the midst thereof…. The people of the land have used oppression, and exercised robbery, and have vexed the poor and needy: yea, they have oppressed the stranger wrongfully. And I sought for a man among them, that should make up the hedge, and stand in the gap before me for the land, that I should not destroy it: but I found none.” Ezekiel 22:25, 29, 30

This text tells of a description of the world in which we are now, even our nation. Robbery, injustice and all kinds of vices pervade the land, and they are not perpetuated by stones, but by human beings – and somebody gave birth to these human beings, somebody has them as offspring.

 “And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth… And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.”  Gen. 1:26, 28

There is a fruitfulness that God demands and puts as part of the functioning of the man He created. God created man in His own image, and if He then says that man should be fruitful, He expects that what is being replenished will still be in His image. In addition to the dominion of the regency that God conferred on man, He said that man should be fruitful and multiply.  In other words, there is a self-producing ability that God puts in every man to replicate the image in which he himself has been created. The question for you who have children is: can you truly say that your off-springs are in the image of God? Remember, God will not come down to do the procreation, or the passing on of His image on to your off-springs, because He has given the ability to you. If you cannot say assuredly that your children are living in the image of God, then you have work to do. But if they are and you still find yourself short of what God expects, you still have work to do.

 “And the LORD said, Shall I hide from Abraham that thing which I do; Seeing that Abraham shall surely become a great and mighty nation, and all the nations of the earth shall be blessed in him? For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him.” Genesis 18:17-19  

God had a significant above average confidence in Abraham. Something must have been special about this man. God thinks so highly of us, that we don’t even know the pedestal on which He has put us, but the level of confidence that God placed on Abraham was to be expressed in certain directions:

Knowing that Abraham would be a great and mighty nation and all the nations of the earth shall be blessed in him – God referred back to the commandment He gave man at creation – to multiply and replenish the earth. The word ‘replenish’ is used for something that has been emptied of what it was filled with, or what it contained.  In other words, what was present on the earth before was totally anathema to God, for God to wipe it away. He therefore has an expectation that what you are going to bring into it, what you will use to replenish it, has to be something that will be pleasing to Him. God knew that Abraham would replenish the earth with offspring that will be pleasing to Him, and this is based on the fact that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the Lord, to do justice and judgement. Do you notice the sequence? God spoke concerning Abraham’s children first, before He spoke about his household, why? A household is made up of father, mother, children, servants, relatives, etc; but in all of these God decided to separate children first, before He talked about household.

In other words, issues of wife or mother take a secondary position in God’s scheme of things in terms of reproducing Himself on the face of the earth. I am not saying that God belittles women, but in terms of His priority for the fulfillment of replenishing the earth according to His own image, God puts special premium on the quality of children you raise. So Mr. Father, who are you populating the world with?

God was confidently sure that Abraham would teach his children His ways, and this was something that was very crucial to God. As a man, as a father, it is not just important for you to know God you ought to know the things that God is passionate about. There is no life that you say you have that loves God, if you are not passionate about what God is passionate over. No leadership whether as a father, a pastor, an elder, is what it is ought to be, if it is not in consonance with God’s passionate issues.

Do you know what God is passionate over? Is it that your son goes to school and graduates; that he has a beautiful wife or plenty of money? What God is passionate over is that your children keep the way of the Lord, and do justice and judgement. If as a father, a parent, you don’t know what God is passionate over, you have missed it!

It is good for your children to go to school. Yes, my children went to school, but one thing they never missed, is that they knew that there is something greater than whatever this world offers.  If you have failed in that as a father, God will call you to book. You can point fingers to the armed robbers on the streets, to the extortioners we see all around, is it not somebody that give birth to them, did they just fall from heaven? We would like to blame their mothers, but let’s see what the word of God says.

The father’s role is one of spiritual leadership in the home, and I want to define that in different dimensions:

• Do you know what God is passionate about?
• Are you also passionate about the same thing?
• Can you communicate that to your children and your household?

It is what you know that you can communicate; and if your problem is communication, God will help you and deliver your from whatever is holding you back from communicating what God has called you to do.

It is interesting to know that God puts children ahead of the household in sequence. David understood that there was a process, that why it is said repeatedly in the Scriptures in Psalm 144:11-12 “Rid me, and deliver me from the hand of strange children, whose mouth speaketh vanity, and their right hand is a right hand of falsehood: That our sons may be as plants grown up in their youth; that our daughters may be as corner stones, polished after the similitude of a palace:”  There is a demand for separation, and if you cannot make your offspring understand that there is a difference between them and the things they see around them, it is natural that they will gravitate towards the things you did not tell them, “don’t do”. That separation is essential because the fellowship of strange children is always that of falsehood

In Psalm 144:12, the words ‘may be as’ there shows that there is a process involved, for our children to become these cornerstones in God’s palace. Deuteronomy 4:9 shows that there is a communication that is expected. “Only take heed to thyself, and keep thy soul diligently, lest thou forget the things which thine eyes have seen, and lest they depart from thy heart all the days of thy life: but teach them thy sons, and thy sons’ sons” Deut. 4:9. There is a communication demand that God imposes on every parent or rather, every father. If as a father you push your responsibilities to your wife, it will come back to your table. Don’t give the excuse that you went to earn money so that your family can survive. I had a job too so that I could send my children to school, but I spent time with them on my knees, so that they understood that there was something else that was more important than whatever the world could give them.

 “And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes. And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates. And it shall be, when the LORD thy God shall have brought thee into the land which he sware unto thy fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob, to give thee great and goodly cities, which thou buildedst not, And houses full of all good things, which thou filledst not, and wells digged, which thou diggedst not, vineyards and olive trees, which thou plantedst not; when thou shalt have eaten and be full; Then beware lest thou forget the LORD, which brought thee forth out of the land of Egypt, from the house of bondage.” Deut. 6:7-12

There is a possibility of forgetting God and all He has done for you when you become very comfortable, that is why He urges you to keep His laws, and teach them diligently to your children. Where is the sense of responsibility for that which is important to God?

There is a process involved (which is not just a one-day thing). The things you say must instruct your children concerning the word of God. If you don’t do that when they are young, when it is time for them to make a choice between God’s values and the values of the world, they will not have what it takes to stand. If your children think you are excessive with your training, make them understand why. Do you prefer to take your children to movies so that they can have fun, instead of sitting down with them to teach them from the word of God? I am not saying that they can’t have fun, but let them understand the things that are in God’s priority list. Remember, no one will teach this to your children except you.

 “And there was a famine in the land: and Abram went down into Egypt to sojourn there; for the famine was grievous in the land. And it came to pass, when he was come near to enter into Egypt, that he said unto Sarai his wife, Behold now, I know that thou art a fair woman to look upon: Therefore it shall come to pass, when the Egyptians shall see thee, that they shall say, This is his wife: and they will kill me, but they will save thee alive. Say, I pray thee, thou art my sister: that it may be well with me for thy sake; and my soul shall live because of thee” (Gen. 12:10-13).

“And there was a famine in the land, beside the first famine that was in the days of Abraham. And Isaac went unto Abimelech king of the Philistines unto Gerar. And the LORD appeared unto him, and said, Go not down into Egypt; dwell in the land which I shall tell thee of: Sojourn in this land, and I will be with thee, and will bless thee; for unto thee, and unto thy seed, I will give all these countries, and I will perform the oath which I sware unto Abraham thy father; And I will make thy seed to multiply as the stars of heaven, and will give unto thy seed all these countries; and in thy seed shall all the nations of the earth be blessed; Because that Abraham obeyed my voice, and kept my charge, my commandments, my statutes, and my laws. And Isaac dwelt in Gerar: And the men of the place asked him of his wife; and he said, She is my sister: for he feared to say, She is my wife; lest, said he, the men of the place should kill me for Rebekah; because she was fair to look upon.” (Gen. 26:1-7).

Comparing these two texts, we find out that Isaac was not born yet when Abraham said that Sarah his wife was his sister, yet he did exactly what his father did when he too, said that Rebecca his wife was his sister. How did it happen, where did Isaac learn that from?  I don’t have an answer for that yet, but it is possible that Abraham must have talked about his experiences in Isaac’s hearing, but in communicating such experiences he never told his son not to do the same! Some of you parents are pretenders, instead of you to tell your children about the areas where you have fallen so that they won’t fall in the same way, you carry yourself about as though you were an angel. Nobody is perfect, God is just helping us.

Another possibility is that Abraham may never have told Isaac about his Egypt experience but we just find him following his father’s footsteps in that mistake. David did not teach all his children until Solomon, but even at that Solomon still failed as his father in the area of women. This goes out to say to us that teaching on its own is not even enough for our children to be able to be who God wants them to be. If a father that taught his children has issues with them understanding it, what about you who has not taught anybody?  There are so many unspoken character flaws in us that our children just copy from us even when we have not said anything to them.

Check yourself as a leader in your home, how have you performed so far? Can you say you have done enough for you children such that wherever they are on the face of the earth they will not stray from God’s way? Have you even started teaching them? What are your priorities, what are you populating the world with, what will you tell God in heaven? After all children are God’s heritage, so you know that you have only been hired to take care of God’s heritage.

 “We have heard with our ears, O God, our fathers have told us, what work thou didst in their days, in the times of old.  How thou didst drive out the heathen with thy hand, and plantedst them; how thou didst afflict the people, and cast them out. For they got not the land in possession by their own sword, neither did their own arm save them: but thy right hand, and thine arm, and the light of thy countenance, because thou hadst a favour unto them” (Psalm 44:1-3). Let us tell the truth to our children, tell them how your life was before you knew the Lord and what changes Jesus brought in your life, so that they also may understand and know the way to walk.

 “Give ear, O my people, to my law: incline your ears to the words of my mouth. I will open my mouth in a parable: I will utter dark sayings of old: Which we have heard and known, and our fathers have told us. We will not hide them from their children, shewing to the generation to come the praises of the LORD, and his strength, and his wonderful works that he hath done. For he established a testimony in Jacob, and appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our fathers, that they should make them known to their children: That the generation to come might know them, even the children which should be born; who should arise and declare them to their children: That they might set their hope in God, and not forget the works of God, but keep his commandments: And might not be as their fathers, a stubborn and rebellious generation; a generation that set not their heart aright, and whose spirit was not stedfast with God” (Psalm 48:1-8).

These people heard about the things God had done for their fathers, because their fathers told them. You have to communicate to your children the things that God is passionate about, not just by words of mouth, but by the quality of your life. This is so that your children might know them, and communicate it to their own children too. And remember, these things are not taught in classrooms, you have to teach them. The only reason for this teaching is so their hope may not be in their certificates, their brains, or in the things that the world may offer them; but to show them that their hope for success in the world can only come from their Creator, the One in whose image they have been created. The only success is that you know Christ, all other things are inferior.

I watched a documentary where I learnt that it is at the age of 8 that young girls begin to get notice the opposite sex; but what are you doing with them at that age? Watching movies and going to eateries? And you forget to teach them the things that will make their lives chaste? At that age, they want to wear make-up like their mothers or have hair done like mommy. And if you don’t teach them the right values, then you will later on wonder what happened to them when they start misbehaving.

Too many of us parents allow our children to have whatever they want because we say “my children must not suffer like I did.” If suffering will lead them in the paths of righteousness, let them go through it! How sure are you that the suffering you went through while growing up is not part of the things that God has used to shape your life today? Check yourself in the mirror of God’s word, and know where you stand in the process of teaching your children to become the image of God.  Remember, no age is too small for you to start with.

In Psalm 78:9-11, we see the children of Ephraim who were carriers of bows and arrows, turn back in the day of battle. Joshua the son of Nun that God allowed to lead Israel was from the tribe of Ephraim. God was building a legacy upon the things that happened in the life of Joshua as a spiritual force and a war-leader; and because of that Ephraim became a major city at the expense of the other tribes. Bethel and Gilgal were in Ephraim, the spiritual and the military mines all resided there, because of a foundation God had laid in the life of a man called Joshua. But when the people abandoned God, He said, “Ephraim is like a half-baked caked, it has mixed itself with all the world around it.”

And because of that, God returned the sceptre of leadership back to Judah. Whatever you do will affect generations to come. If you have failed in carrying out the responsibility that God has given you as a father over your children, you don’t know its consequences.

Daniel, Hananiah, Mishael and Azariah were all princes, and as princes they had everything at their disposal. But when a change in circumstances of life came, and  they were taken to Babylon and put in the custody of the Eunuch, they had a choice to make – would they continue in priesthood according to the way of the world and thus have access to the king’s food and wine or would they obey the laws of the Eternal God. They refused the king’s food because there was something deeper than food that was at stake – they saw spiritual betrayal ahead of them, and they made a choice for spiritual values, as against whatever else they needed to maintain their lives.

Whether you are rich or not, it matters not to God. If because you don’t want your children to go through some of the things that you went through you allow them anything, God will judge you! Search your minds, search your spirits, because whatever you allow for your children, the fruits will soon show. Do your children truly know the difference between what the world is seeking and the expectation of God in their lives, as those who have been given spiritual values? If you are waiting for them to grow up before you teach them, you would have lost them. Daniel, Shedrach, Meshach and Abednego stood their ground, because they understood that God had not called them to the place of safety,  but to the place of bravery.

Who will be brave for God, and take his stand in the things that belong to God? What have you raised your children for – to be stamped in the image of God? What glory are you seeking for them – the glory of the world? The Bible says in 1 Cor. 11, that the man was in the image and glory of God; but the woman was in the glory of man; it did not say anything about the image because the image of God even for women is not something to be compromised. You may dress so that you can reflect the glory of your husband, but never compromise the image of the spirit of God in your life, because you are not in your husband’s image, but in the image of the living God. Why is it easier for parents of this generation to take their children to eateries or movies, rather than to take them to go and behold the wonders of nature, showing them the great works of God? Where did king David learn all that he wrote about, in Silverbird Galleria? No, he learnt them in the wilderness, where everything around him were pointing to the creator of the heavens and earth. Aain’t there things that we can show to our children concerning the greatness of our God?

I am not saying you should not take your children out to eateries or to the movies, but let them know that those things are not the real things. God will judge the church of today, because we exchange the glory of God for the corruptible glory of this world.

The responsibility of a father is a very important such that it even determines if a man can gain a place of leadership in the house of God. “This is a true saying, If a man desire the office of a bishop, he desireth a good work. A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behaviour, given to hospitality, apt to teach; Not given to wine, no striker, not greedy of filthy lucre; but patient, not a brawler, not covetous; One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity” (1 Tim. 3:1-5).

If a man is not successful in raising children according to God’s passion and desire, he has no business in taking a role of a leader in the church of God, because eldership is not a title, it is a responsibility.

As a father, how do you lead when things are hopeless? When things are hopeless, the only way to know that the spirit of rulership or leadership is on you is that you go back to your source. When your gaze is on circumstances around you in times of hopelessness you get into despair, and you will eventually backslide. It is at such times that your faith is tested, and your source will be known. That is why you must teach your children that their hope is in God.