His Legacy For His Heritage Part 2

Posted on September 23, 2019

Home Blog Posts His Legacy For His Heritage Part 2

Exemple

His Legacy For His Heritage Part 2

Children carry on whatever legacy or examples that parents hand down to them, therefore ensuring to pass down godly legacies becomes an imperative task for parents.

Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old will not depart from it.” I love what Abraham Lincoln said about this Scripture. He said, “the best way to bring up a child is to travel the same way with him.” That means, if you say your child must not watch Television for more than two hours, you are also bound by that law. You are actually free to watch TV, but you forfeit it for your child’s sake. 1 Corinthians 10:23 says “all things are lawful, but all things are not expedient …”

Parenting and passing down godly legacies is all about sacrificial living. Though you have liberty, but when it interferes with the progress of your children (or brother, wife, mother and other people around you), you have to “pocket” that liberty and operate as though you have no liberty. If you love your child, you will make sacrifices. Love that is not sacrificial is no love and I’m not talking about money, money is the least sacrifice you can make for your children.

There is something called “guilt-parenting.” This happens when there is a situation beyond your control or your fault, and you can’t correct your child again, so you give him anything he asks for so he will not get angry. Guilt-parenting results in destroying a whole destiny of God’s heritage. Another situation of this happens when you are continually absent as a parent, then you start buying expensive toys for your children to compensate for this. Let me tell you, you are not compensating for anything; you are only wasting your money.

There was a millionaire friend of Mike Murdock who had a very rebellious child, when the man was tired, he called for counsel with the man of God – Mike Murdock.  He told Mike Murdock that he bought his son a Ferrari when he was still in school to bribe his way through his son’s heart to love him. But his son kept telling everyone, “My father does not love me.” The man of God counseled him: “Take your boy, just the two of you alone, go to an island and spend at least two hours there. Don’t give him money again, don’t give him gifts, and collect the car from him.” That was the end of the boy’s hostility.

Somebody said “children spell LOVE as TIME, not MONEY!” If you tell your child, “how can you say that I don’t love you when all I do is for you?” That is a fat lie, because all you do is for yourself. After all, you had been working before the child was born, so stop the lie. You say to your children, “It is because of you I have no rest.” If you don’t have rest, it is your stress, they did not ask you to bring them to the world. “I pay your school fees, I give you allowances, I do this, I do that.” Hey, Stop it! Children spell LOVE as T-I-M-E. So if you are not spending time with them, they don’t believe you love them, buy all the toys you want!

It has been said over and again that nobody on a death bed regrets not working an extra hour; they all have often regretted not spending enough time with their families. You don’t have to end like that, there is always a way where there is a will, but stop making excuses. If something is important to you, then you will create time for it. Have you ever seen where time is static? Time is always on the run. Tell a parent to report in school because of a child and he comes up with excuses, “my work, my this, my that.” Then that child is not important to you. But if this same parent was told that this same child is in police custody, they will in no time run there. This shows that there is problem about the conception of children; we don’t really value them as we pretend to. We only love them to the extent that money can solve the problem; and that’s why they do not feel that you love them. And when they feel you do not love them it means you are not there for them. Somebody said, “If you are going to be in your children’s memory tomorrow, be in their life today.” The person didn’t say “put money in their life.” Give your children listening ears, even when you know they are babbling.

The price of love is to get interested in what interests your lover. So if you love your child, you get interested in what interests them. If it is ten-ten game that your child likes, play it with her. A very wealthy friend of one of my mentors was asked what his most memorable childhood experience was. This was somebody who said their father used to take them to Disney World and other places like that, cruising and having fun all over the world. The person who questioned expected him to mention Disney World and cruises for an answer, but his response was really unexpected. He said the time he enjoyed most in his childhood was when his father would roll on the rug with he and his siblings. As a parent, do you have time for such “nonsense”? I call it nonsense because that is what it is, but it is such ‘nonsense’ that binds us with our children. No, you always have an appointment, or you need to read Bible. Oh! You are a very ‘spiritual’ daddy who did not read in the Bible that there is time for everything. The person that asked the question particularly was surprised and said to the man, “I know your daddy used to take you to Disney World.” In response, he said “I don’t even remember that until now that you reminded me.” But wake me anytime, I will remember what I said earlier, we would play on the rug with Daddy to the ground, play fighting with Daddy. As I say it now, it feels like yesterday.” You can’t have played with your child in this way and he will not have you in his memory tomorrow, impossible! We need to give godly legacies to God’s heritage because it is only godly heritages that can work for them when we are not there, and this will go beyond what we can give them.

Proverbs 19:14 says, “House and riches are the inheritance of fathers, and a prudent wife is from the lord.” So, you are limited to what you can bequeath to your children. They need a godly legacy; they need something more than houses and riches. Proverbs 13:22 says “a good man leaveth an inheritance for his children’s children, but the riches of the wicked are laid up for the just.” You will think that ‘inheritance’ here refers to money and houses because that is what we have been told by the motivational speakers of this world. Yes I agree, but there is how far money and houses can go. What about when your son gets to the point where he needs a wife? As Proverbs 31:10 puts it: “a virtuous woman who can find?” When God asks you a question, don’t bother to answer, just say, “Thou knowest Lord.” In Job 38 God asked Job “where were you when this and that were done?” I can imagine Job thinking for an answer, but God was telling him, “I am not your mate.” Houses are the inheritance of fathers, which is your limit; but there is a limitless God who is the owner of these children. So, what you need to give them is beyond riches and houses because it will get to a point where houses and riches cannot work. We must learn to give them a godly heritage and legacy because they are of God. It is only a godly heritage that can translate to much for them.

 

King David for instance, left a legacy that made God say, “even if your children sin against Me, I will only beat them with the rod of men but I will not take the kingdom away from them.” That was a father indeed. Even after David had been long gone, his children were still enjoying it. Houses can burn; ask those who have experienced a tsunami. Money will be cankered but the blessings of the Lord, makes rich and adds no sorrow. That means all the houses and riches are inside the blessing. That is what our children need, and how do you get that done?

 

Proverbs 20:21 “an inheritance quickly gained at the beginning will not be blessed at the end” If it is God’s legacy you want to leave to them, it is something that you will not get in a hurry. It will take years of endurance; years of training. Sometimes you might take reproach for some of them, but bear the shame, and go with them in the mud so that they can be helped. So the kind of legacy we are talking about is not the type you can conjure in one year. Therefore be ready, tighten your belt and the grace of God will help you in Jesus name. It is doable! It will cost you, but it will last (Luke 8:15; Hebrew 6:12; 10:35-36). Even when you have done the will of God, you still need patience. So when you have done all and there is no sign that you have done anything, just trust God. The Bible said when you have done all, stand. Are you wondering if you have wasted all your life training a particular child? Remember, God has not called you to labor in vain. That is where faith comes in; trust God to bring forth the increase, as Paul said 1 Corinthians 3:6. It is not something that can come hastily but the end is blessed. The one that comes hastily the end will not be blessed. You can quickly pour money into your child’s account, the end is not blessed. But this legacy that takes time and effort and a lot of patience, the fruit that will grow.

 

Let us check those who succeeded in giving legacy to the heritages of God under them – Abraham. Gen 18:17-19, “And the Lord said shall I hide from Abraham that thing which I do … For I know, that he will command his children and his household after him and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment…” God knew that Abraham would command his children and his household after him, because he is the one that will lead them, he won’t just tell them to go to church. Abraham exhibited what Abraham Lincoln said – “the best way to train a child is to travel the same road with him.”

 

Isaiah 62:10 talks about lifting up a standard, not two, not many standards. Standard here is referring to the flag used to locate things on the sea. When you have two, you cause confusion. How are you as a father in your house, how many standards do you operate? The Bible says in Ephesians 4:14; that it is children who are tossed to and fro with every wind of doctrine, adults don’t do that. But how come your standard keeps changing according to the current? That kind of life confuses children, it makes them lose respect for parents and they may not say it, because they are still under your roof. We need to make adjustments in the way we deal with our children, by taking the lead.

 

When I still had time for coaching, if I told my players to run round the field forty times, I would have completed ten before they joined me for the next forty. Then tell me who among them will be headstrong that will not follow. That is the power of example, the power of leadership. Somebody once said “if you call yourself a leader and no one is following you, you are just taking a stroll.” But God said that “Abraham is a leader, he will lead his household to Me.”

 

Let us look at a godly legacy that produced fruits generations and generations after – The Rechabites.

 

Jeremiah 35: 1-11; 18, “… And Jeremiah said unto the house of the Rechabites, thus said the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel; because you have obeyed the commandment of your father Jonadab, and kept all his precepts, and done according unto all the that he hath commanded you: therefore thus saith the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel ; Jonadab the son of Rechab shall not want a man to stand before me forever.”

 

Jonadab had died and his bones rotten in the grave, but his children who were already grandfathers, still obeyed the commanded he gave them. This shows that there must be something he got right, that several years after, they still owned up to the legacy. Do you think they were not tempted to build houses, or were not tempted to do what others were doing? Was it that they did not have the capacity? No, but their love for their father constrained them. Do your children love you so much that when you don’t have force over them again, they will not relent on everything they had learnt? Now you can still harass them, because you give them pocket money. When they are away from you, then they will live the life that they have always wanted to live, because there is no conviction. But for the Rechabites, this cord on the children from the inside will not allow them, as 2 Corinthians 5:14 says, “the love of God constraints us…”

 

When I was in school I couldn’t join Kegites because of how my mother would feel if she found out. She was my only hindrance to being a kegite even though the kegites put a lot of pressure on me to join them. She never told me not to join the kegites even for a day. She didn’t even know if there was anything called kegites. But I loved her so much that I didn’t want to break her heart, or have her to see me in slaves clothing, because that is what kegites wear. I was sure she would faint, that I had wasted my life. The love I had for my mom constrained me, because I lived to see my mother as Headmistress of a school who couldn’t buy what staff employees under her were buying, in order for her children to wear suits at Christmas time in December. Are you such a mother?

 

How did the Rechabites transfer this legacy seamlessly from generation to generation without breaking the cord? I think the key was love. They were not coarse like most of us parents are. You tell your children, “this is my house,” and when they are no longer in your house, your laws fade. We must strive, and make attempts to get interested in what interests our children; that is the easiest way to get them.

 

Record has it that the Rechabites are still in Yemen and Iraq till date, and you can be sure that they are not Muslims because that will not mean “standing before God forever” – which was the blessing they received afterwards. See how the blessing came generations after? That is true blessing; a godly legacy – something that stills works, that lives beyond you as a parent.

 

But how can we transfer godly legacies to our children? God says in Ephesians 6:1-4 and Colossians 3:20-21, “Don’t provoke your children …” Because they are children, their tolerance level is very low. So don’t over stretch it, don’t exasperate them or make them get tired of life and give up on everything; although you have to be careful of children who may want to take advantage of this. One of the Popes, Saint Francis XVI, said “give me a child for the first seven years of his life and let anybody have him for the rest of his life.” Why? That is because a child is totally formed at seven. What do you do with your children in the first six years of their life? It has been found out by psychologists, that at age five to six, a child begins to question parents about the things they tell them about God. So if they can’t see the God you talk to them about at that age, they begin to doubt God; and I don’t mean telling them Bible stories. Children remember what we teach them, but they do what they see us do. Mike Murdock said he has seen his father on his knees more that on his feet. So tell me, why won’t Mike Murdock pray for four hours every day – no interruptions, no phones? Many of our children have seen their parents gist all their lives, they never pray except they say a blessing on a meal. How then do you think you can get the results God wants?

 

The most dangerous instruction in the bible is this, “children obey your parents in all things …” (Col 3:20-21). Don’t think it a privilege to shout down on your children reminding them of this Bible verse, because if you give them useless instructions and they obey, God holds you responsible. So that means you must know what is right from wrong and give the right instructions. We have to bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord. So we must discipline our children – training. It is when they have grown past childhood that we begin to admonish them. To discipline a child’s will, can only be done while he is young. Don’t ever tell your child, “Don’t mind your Sunday School teacher.” Don’t back-bite your Pastor while your child is listening, you are destroying that child and you will answer to the God for it. Don’t set your children at loggerheads with other families you don’t like or who have offended you, you will destroy their soul if you do this. Do you weigh your instructions before you pass them? Many of us are too busy to attend our child’s school for any occasion, what excuse do you have? You don’t even know any of the teachers in his school. Many fathers just pass this on as a responsibility to the mother. Be responsible, go to his school, know his teachers, and get to know his friends, visit after school to see how he leaves, watch him when he doesn’t know you are around. These are the things that tell our children that we love them.

 

It has been proven that children who are disciplined most by teachers and parents are the ones who are loved most and they feel secured. It is an innate thing, because it makes them know that they are safe with such people; that they cannot go wrong and be let scot-free. Ephesians 6:4 says, “… bring them up in the nurture and discipline …” that means, you tailor their wings. Don’t let anybody deceive you, discipline is not punishment, and a child does not have to offend to be disciplined. To discipline a child means to give direction to his will. Punishment can come if he deliberately breaks the boundaries. There is what is called childhood irresponsibility – for instance, you keep a cup of water on the rug and a toddler crawls up to it and pours it away; you as the parent should be beaten and not the child. It is wickedness to beat that child. That is not rebellion, because the child is not daring you. But when you tell a child, “Do not touch this flower” and he does touch it, that child should be punished. If you spare him, you are destroying him.

 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *